True Religion: Feeling Obligated to Do Something?

Feeling obligated to do somethingHave you ever walked in a store, tried on a piece of clothing, decide to buy it, go to the checkout counter to pay for it and for some reason, the price is 10 times higher than you expected? What do you do at this point?

Maybe some of you are thinking, “How the hell can that happen? There’s a price tag on clothes.” I know, but apparently it happens more often than we think. Of course, it happened to me not too long. What was even more shocking was when I was told about the ‘common’ reaction the person purchasing the item has when this happens.

I went shopping for a pair of jeans in a very popular mall. Now, before going any further, you should probably know a very important detail about me, I HATE SHOPPING! I don’t remember the last time I went shopping for a piece of clothing. So, I decided to ask my teen aged nieces to come along for advice. Our first stop was at Guess. A hundred dollars for a pair of jeans seemed a little steep for me. I didn’t really care about the designer name. So, I decided to keep looking.

As they made a pit stop in another store, I noticed a store with a huge display of jeans.

The name of the store didn’t sound familiar to me. I figured, this should be my kind of place.

I actually saw 2 pairs that seemed pretty fashionable. I went for the price tag, grabbed it with my thumb and index finger, $40. WOW, “maybe I’ll get both.” I was only getting one pair for $100 at Guess; this seemed like a pretty good deal.

I stepped out to go get my nieces and the 3 of us walked back in the store. The sales person, seeing me coming back with 2 more people, immediately approached us. I told him I wanted to try both pairs of jeans. I turned around and noticed my nieces whispering to each other. They both looked like they had seen a ghost. Their lips had got white and they had lost color in their face. They didn’t say a word the entire time.

As soon as the salesman walked away with the jeans heading for the dressing room, both girls grabbed my arm, “Toni, those are True Religion jeans!” I stood there, not knowing what the hell that meant.

“They’re what?”

“They’re True Religion, what are you doing?”

Ok, they had to tell me what the hell that meant. Why were they freaking out so much?

I asked them, “What does that mean. Are they some sort of spiritual jeans? Am I joining some cult if I buy them?”

“NOOOO, they’re $400 jeans!”

Now, I know I had checked the price earlier.

They picked up the price tag and sure enough, $400 freakin’ dollars for a pair of jeans!”

My thumb was hiding all the little zeros when I had originally checked the tag.

“What???? There’s no way I buying them.”

“That’s what we figured since you thought the Guess jeans were too expensive. You asked him for 2 pairs. It’s going to cost you close to $1,000 with the taxes.”

Hmmmm… What did she mean “it’s gonna cost me?” All I had to do was walk out, right?

They were mortified that I would actually leave now that the sales person had spent time to serve me. It’s not that I didn’t appreciate his service, but why would I try on the jeans and spend $1,000 on something that didn’t mean much to me?

I politely thanked him for all his help, explained what happened and left.

I later explained to my nieces that I had no interest in designer jeans. It is not something I would enjoy to justify the $400. If I would have bought the jeans, it would only be because I felt I had to. I would have been VERY unhappy about it. I gave myself permission not to do something I felt strongly opposed to because that’s just not me!

I asked them,

“Don’t you think that I owe it to myself to spend my money and time on things that I genuinely want and enjoy?”

They both laughed and agreed.

“Ok, I had enough of shopping and would rather spend my time doing something fun together with both of you than be in a mall.”

What do you think?

Don’t we owe it to ourselves to spend our money and time on things we genuinely want? Giving yourself permission not to do something you feel strongly opposed to and tell yourself,

“No, that’s just not me!”

I look forward to hearing about what you would have done in this situation in the comments.

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This entry was posted in Cleansing Your Beliefs and tagged , , .

4 Responses to True Religion: Feeling Obligated to Do Something?

  1. Antonia says:

    Hi Christine,

    YES, Absolutely! There’s NO SHAME in saying no to something we really don’t want to do. There’s no shame in making a mistake. In the end, we are left with being unhappy or in a ‘jam’ (like Nikki’s story), don’t other people!

    Thanks for sharing your valuable thoughts!

  2. Nikki says:

    You had the right reaction. I would have done the same… But let me tell you a funny story. My ex husband is from the Dominican Republic and growing up was very poor.. So for him looking good in front of people is important. He doesnt want to come off cheap. He wanted to go shopping downtown at a specific store. So off i sent him with his GPS in hand to purchase a pair of jogging pants… He ends up in a mall with very expensive stores… So he goes into a store to look and sees a nice white jacket made of nylon…. He really liked it and sees the price… $90, not so bad so he decides to buy it.. He gets to the cash and the girl says that will be $1025.00. In his head he is having a heart attack… The jacket was $900.00 not $90.00… Feeling really bad but not wanting to look poor he hands over his credit card a pays for it… He calls me from the car hyperventilating!! I freaked at first and said dont worry i will go the next day and return it…. Of course the store had a no return policy and so he was stuck with a $1000 ralph lauren WHITE nylon jacket!!! A very expensive lesson to learn!! Lolll

    • Antonia says:

      Hi Nikki,

      WOW!!! I could just imagine the SHOCK! Like you said, I believe that we all end up doing things that we are opposed to, ‘to look good in front of people.’

      It is a funny story (maybe not so much for him:)), thanks for sharing!

  3. Christine says:

    I would have done exactly the same… I too hate shopping and wouldn’t spend a fortune on clothes as I can’t justify paying just for a label, I don’t care about and on top pay to do advertising for them!
    Like you, I would have apologised and say I can’t afford that price and made a mistake on the price. There is no shame – to me there are more important things in life I want to spend my money on.

    Thanks for all your good stories. I enjoy reading them 🙂
    Christine M